Family Adventure

We went on a family adventure today. We hunted for geocaches around town and found two. The first one we found was located under a lightpost.
The second one we found was at a nearby playground. Bri had fun swinging again! She is so cute. On the way home, as we stopped at a red light a huge pick up truck slammed into the back of our car. A teenager (only 15 years old) had been driving and talking on his cellphone. The back windshield shattered and sprayed glass across the back seat and Bri's carseat. It was very traumatic for all of us.
Both of us immediately wanted to make sure Bri was okay. Hubster pulled her out of her carseat and brushed her off. We didn't even let ourselves think of the horrible what ifs until we were safely home a few hours later. We hauled our stuff to the curb and a tow truck pulled our totalled car away. Thank goodness Hubby was there to clean the car out, while I held Bri and called friends. Everyone is out of town for Mother's Day so I had to call four different couples before I found someone who could give us a ride home. It would have been overwhelming if I'd been alone with the baby.
A friend came to pick us up and we were shaky as she started up her car. Bri has been fine since it all happened although she gets upset at loud noises. We're a little sore, but nothing that some Ibuprofen can't fix.

Tomorrow, some close friends are going to give us a ride to church. We'll be looking for a new vehicle this week. Happy Mother's Day, right? When we did get everything settled at home, we fed Bri, let her play on the floor for forty five minutes in the living room, and then put her down for her regular nap. Then we held each other and let the possibilities roll over us. It could have been so much worse than losing the car. Thank God that we didn't lose our baby.

Messiness in Moderation

The lovely ladies at our daycare have passed on a few helpful tricks for keeping Bridoodle neat and clean. In fact, I believe that in their minds, on a perfect day, they wouldn't have any messes to clean up at all. Shocking, huh?

They would be dismayed to see how Bri has her dinner each night. It is quite normal to find her finger painting with mashed peas or putting gobs of squash in her hair. When I shared this thought, with one hand on the doorknob, as I was leaving the daycare, both of the ladies stopped what they were doing and stared at me. I could see the utter horror etched on their faces. It made me stop and think.

You see, I believe, although I've never voiced it until now, that babies learn a lot from messiness. I love watching Bri study the consistency of the food she eats. I let her explore warm, cold; smooth, mushy; and sticky or watery things all the time. She's absorbing the world. And I think it's natural to let her enjoy the messy sides of life too.

Now I don't just let her explore any old thing! Of course, I wouldn't let her play with something that would hurt her. But I figure, since I'm about to give her a bath anyway, it's okay if she grabs the spoon and flings peas into her hair. It's fun to watch her discover the way that feels. And it's okay if her clothes have a few stains on them. After all, she won't even be able to wear them anymore in a few weeks!

I've found that on the nights where I'm in a hurry and I don't want her to make a mess, we both end up unhappy and frustrated. The extra five minutes I spend cleaning up around the kitchen doesn't even compare to the fun I get from watching her squeal with laughter as she spreads cold pear mush all over her tray. What can I say? I just think it's fun!

BPA - What's a mom to do?

As a college senior, in Ecology class, I had to read Taking Back Our Stolen Future. It's a Green Peace book dealing with the exposure of animals to the chemicals found in PVC plastics. These everyday plastics were commonly found polluting lake ecosystems in the Northern USA. The animals exposed to them had all sorts of strange birth defects. The documented evidence was chilling. They found that these hormone mimicking chemicals were released in even higher quantities when plastic products are microwaved.

Since then, I've learned about another component of plastics, Bisphenol A (BPA), that mimics the estrogen hormone. BPA is a common ingredient in baby bottles. Microwaving the bottles increases the amount of BPA that leaches into the formula. According to Wikipedia's article on BPA, an "NIH-sponsored panel in the U.S. determined that there was 'some concern' about BPA's effect on fetal and infant brain and behavior.^[18]"

The article also quotes Dr. Maida Galvez, a pediatrician studying BPA, who recommends parents stay away from bottles containing the chemical and says, "We know the animal studies raise concerns, but there aren't human studies showing effects yet ... so, when we don't have the evidence, what we recommend is that parents try to err on the side of caution."^[21]

Here's another terrifying quote from the Wikipedia article.

Infants fed with liquid infant formula have among the highest exposures of anyone eating canned foods. Infants fed canned formula with polycarbonate bottles can consume quantities of bisphenol A up to 13 µg/kg/day,^[23] while the most sensitive animal studies show effects at much lower concentrations. Debate continues on what is the safe limit of this compound.

It is my understanding that powdered infant formula has not been tested for BPA and that the safest bottles to use are glass bottles. The next best thing would be the Playtex drop-in bottles.

According to an Environmental Working Group article published in Dec 2007, "BPA levels in powdered formula sold in the United States haven’t been tested, but this formula is diluted with water before being fed to babies, and thus poses less risk to babies."

According to Playtex "The [Nurser] system uses disposable liners made of polyethylene (a type of plastic that does not contain BPA)- in both Drop Ins liners and rolled liners. So, the only contact between baby and the food is through the nipple and the liners, which are both BPA- free."

Without question, breastfeeding is the safest way to feed your baby. When that is not an option, the EWG has made a list of recommendations to help moms.

For a list of bottles containing BPA click here.
For more information about how to protect your family from BPA click here.

Wam-Lart

We're running low on diapers and cough drops around here, which means it's time to take a trip to the gigantic overflowing supercrazy packed with people store. I'm dreading it. I was going to go yesterday, but when I saw all of the cars in the parking lot I turned around and drove away. The parking lot could hold five football fields but it wouldn't hold one more car!
I've been thinking about how much I hate going to this particular store and I've come to the conclusion that they should sell 'front-of-the-line passes' like the ones that you find at theme parks. When you purchase a 'front-of-the-line pass' to Wally World you would get a front row parking spot and a buggy that does not veer to the left. You would get a little card that you swipe through a scanner when you go down an aisle and all the other customers would have to move out of your way quickly so you could get to the items you need. And there would be special bathrooms that are luxurious and not smelly at all. They would have an adorable baby changing area that was semi-private and not in anyone's way. But most importantly, after you'd spent all your time and energy finding your buggy full of purchases, you would be able to walk up to an empty register where a very polite person would happily ring you up and let you be on your way. Ahh! Wouldn't that be nice?

okay, maybe not perfect

Since my last post I've changed four poopy diapers (a new record around here), three of Bri's outfits, and given her a bath. She's been messy and fussy ever since I had my little happy moment (during which I just happened to be blogging). And it started raining.

It's a character-building day.

True Tragedy

Once upon a time in a land not so far away, there lived a family that homeschooled their three daughters and one son. The oldest daughter was 12 years old and my friend. We shared a passion for Jeanette Oke books and riding horses. When my family moved to Not so Far Away, we had to sell our three horses because Mama wanted to live in a neighborhood instead of out in the country. So I loved to visit my friend's house and her horses every once in awhile. Her middle sister was the same age as my little sister. They would play together when we visited. And her youngest sister loved to pick my Mom's pockets for candy. She was adorable. In my mind she will always be that precocious four year old although it was more than a decade ago. The middle sister was very quiet and sweet. She had long blonde hair and a gorgeous smile. I honestly can't remember ever talking to her directly although I'm sure that I must have.

I haven't seen the whole family in probably five or six years. The mom and the oldest daughter attended a friend's wedding shower this summer, when I was still pregnant. We made small talk. Her mom asked if I'd been married long while eyeing my belly. My mom cooly replied that I'd been married for three years. We found out that the older sister was working with her dad. The middle sister was engaged to be married. Life seemed pretty good. I didn't think much of it at all.

Early this week, the middle sister was thrown off of a horse and suffered severe trauma to the head. She worked on a horse farm that teaches children how to perform for competition. Apparently she was very good at it. Later that afternoon she died in the hospital. The funeral is today. She was only 22 years old.

The whole community is still in shock. I can't even imagine what her family and especially her fiancee must be going through. How can you even begin to explain why this happened? It seems like such a devastating blow. I believe that she's in heaven because I've seen the faith of her family. Even without knowing her very well, I have no doubt that she lived for Jesus. The thing that troubles me though is that she had just reached the brink of womanhood. She missed out on so much joy and pain. The best day of my life was my wedding day and it seems so tragic that she died within a few months of her own special day.

Police Scanner

Teenage and college-aged girls tend to dream about weddings and husbands. They try on different roles like playing dress-up in their minds. What would it be like to be a pastor's wife? Just imagine your life in a fishbowl where you had to be nice to the staring people. What would it be like to be a rancher's wife? Hmm... the horses would be fun but calf nuts gross me out. What would it be like to be a missionary couple? I'd have to bring a suitcase of Q-tips and I wonder if I'd be able to find Hershey's bars in the outdoor market. Anyway, you get the picture. I had a very active imagination and in boring lecture classes, I often daydreamed about possible future scenarios. Not once, and I mean NOT ONCE, did I ever imagine being a cop's wife. Somehow, I glossed over that possible profession, probably because my subconscious knew that I was not cut out to be a Mrs. PoliceOfficer at that time. Even now, when I think about it, I wonder how I became a cop's wife.

It's not that I'm not tough enough. I'm a teacher at a fairly inner-city high school. I had a student in third period last year who actually robbed a fast food place at gunpoint. And at the last football game, much to my Hubby's shock, I single handedly stopped a huge stampede of kids that were running to witness a fight. I'm tough, I tell you. They walked in an orderly fashion to the fight because of me. Hey, fights are interesting. What can I say? Anyway, I am tough. I can be downright scary. Just ask my seventh period class.

And it's not that I'm afraid for his life. Although, I am a little bit sometimes. But he's a crack shot. I think he can give the bad guys a run for their money. He's going to be the best cop this state's ever seen, no doubt. And I am very impressed with the way he's been/being trained. I feel safe whenever he's around.

So what's the problem? Well, there are two. First- I hate guns. I know that it's different when it's used for law enforcement. But that also means that our kids will grow up around guns which scares me. Heaven help us if we have boys! I want to be able to feel good about letting them play with plastic guns and army men without having to worry about whether or not they're going to find Daddy's real gun and try it out on each other. Yes, I know this is a hypothetical way-down-the-road scenario. But it still scares me. Plus I have this silly theory that if we never have guns then we'll never get in a situation where we need to use a gun. I know it doesn't make any sense but that's just my silly non-logic.

The second problem is the one that I didn't see right off the bat. It sort of blindsided me. I don't think it really has so much to do with the Hubster being a police officer as it does with him absolutely loving his job. What I mean is this- his job consumes him. In the bathroom there are guns and ammo magazines and Cops magazines. Every night on TV we're watching a marathon of Cops or Swat or DallasPD or if none of the reality police shows are on then CSI will do. And that's great! I love that he loves his job. I really do. I've seen him in the opposite situation (an awful, horrible, no-good, very bad job) and it was downright depressing. However, I feel a little bit like he has a mistress. Not an actual real life woman that I could find and beat the snot out of. (Did I mention that I'm tough? Don't mess with my man, honey!) But a mistress that occupies all of his thoughts and can call him away at a moment's notice during important things like birthdays and Christmas. It's hard to fight her too because a big part of me is thrilled that he's so happy. I guess, selfishly, I just wanted to make him happy all by myself. That's terrible, isn't it?

Anyway, all of these observations have made me realize that I need to turn this issue over to the Lord. It seems like I've been finding lots of issues to bring Him lately. That's why I'm choosing this verse for Memory Verse Monday.

Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved. Psalm 55:22

how do single moms do this?

I have to say that two weeks into my new job as a mom I am more than just a little overwhelmed. There's so much work that goes into taking care of a baby! I am so grateful that we have such a wonderful supportive group of friends. Our Sunday School class has been bringing us meals. Friends have been visiting. My mother-in-law stayed with us and was tons of help! But most of all my husband has been wonderful about making sure I'm okay and getting enough sleep.
I'm starting to appreciate the saying that it "takes a village to raise a child." I know that I couldn't do all of this on my own or in a new city or far from my family. I'm really grateful that everyone is so close and willing to help out!

Contractions

For my non-pregnant friends I wanted to enlighten you on the joys of contractions. I'm doing this partly because they're not at all what I expected them to be like and partly because every time I mention that we're inducing a week early, I get the "Why on earth would you want to do that?" response. Well the answer in short is that my contractions started this time last week. No joke. We were at my in-laws house last Saturday night when I felt the first one. It was like having an invisible corset cinched tight around my big belly. At first they were about 30 minutes apart and easy to time. I was actually excited to feel them. Yay! Here comes the baby! But I didn't tell anyone yet because I knew we were still a long way from going to the hospital. The corset will tighten and then slowly release over and over. Sometimes it doesn't release all the way and then it feels kind of like your abdomen does when you're doing the type of crunches where you're just holding your head up for a long time.
Things started getting painful three days later. On top of the corset-tightening pain there was a muscle cramping type pain. This most likely had to do with the fact that my uterine muscles had been contracting non-stop since Saturday night. That corset-type pain has been non-stop even in my sleep since last week. But thankfully the muscle pain comes and goes. I've even had a few days since then where I didn't have the muscle pain at all during the day. Today we've added a third type of pain on top of those two. The muscles in my back are really tight and they seem to tighten when a contraction is really strong. It makes you want to bend over and hold your belly so that the weight isn't on your back anymore.

And I almost forgot - there's another component to all of this too. In order for Bri to come out she has to "engage" which means she has to fit her head between the bones of my pelvis. That's a very strange sensation too. It sort of makes you jump and it feels uncomfortable but it's exciting because that means she's close to being ready. I haven't had her stay engaged for longer than 5 minutes at a time so far though. At least, not that I could feel. So basically, all this discomfort has made me very willing to go ahead and induce labor. I know that active labor (the next stage - the part they always show on "The Birth Story") will be loads more painful but at least it will have a definitive ending point and an epidural and more importantly a BABY on the other side!! :o)

quiet moments

Today I find myself savoring the blessings of life again. It's so nice to have these brief windows where the depression recedes and life takes on its vibrancy. Lilly and I took a walk today and the grass was so green, the air so hot. It was marvelous. Later she curled up in my lap while Savannah purred over my head and I read a great book. Right now I have brownies baking in the oven. Life looks good. I type all of this so that in the dark places I can come back and look out this window again. I know the strength I feel right now, and the determination to take on the world will fade, maybe within hours if not days. But soon I will regain my once optimistic outlook on life and will charge forward again. Until then I thank the Lord for the blessings of a peaceful quiet day.