The problem is that I am becoming more and more dissatisfied with what I see in those mirrors.
When I look back over the course of my pregnancy and all of the preparations that I made to become a mother, I realize that I was totally unprepared for how my image of myself would change. It was a gradual change. A shifting of perspective. Somewhere within those trimesters it became really difficult to see myself as a vibrant, sexy woman again. And even now, as I carry my precious seventeen pound bundle around in my arms instead of on my stomach, I still have a hard time finding that confidence again.
It goes so much deeper than a simple haircut or flattering outfit. I'm sure it's all in my head, but it's very hard to articulate exactly what I see differently. Help, me out here. Am I crazy? Has this happened to you? How did you regain your confidence?
I have confidence in sunshine ... I have confidence in rain ... I have confidence that spring will come again... ~The Sound of Music~
2 comments:
Nope, your not crazy, I have the very same problem. I don't know what it is or why it happens, but I can not look in the mirror and think "Wow, looking good today!" and like you I never had problems with self confidence before. After the second baby I just feel like a pile of poo all the time. Maybe it is some kind of subconscience thing that mom's are not supposed to be hot? Long post but you are not alone.
Don't be too hard on yourself. When you go through pregnancy, childbirth, and possibly breastfeeding, your body changes a lot! And your role in life changes so completely when you become a mom. I think it's very normal to have those feelings of being somewhat adrift, because your perception of yourself is shifting, even if you aren't aware of it. Not to mention all the hormones. Do NOT underestimate the effect of those hormones on the way you think, feel, etc. I think for me, it was around Annalie's first birthday that I was back to feeling "normal" again, though normal had changed. :-)
You'll get there! I'll keep you in my prayers.
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